Why We’re All Terrible at Remembering Names (and How to Fix It)

As a 25-year-old teacher, I meet new students, parents, and colleagues all the time. And let’s be honest—remembering names is one of the hardest things about my job. It’s not that I don’t care. In fact, I want to remember every name, but within seconds of an introduction, it often slips away. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Forgetting names is an incredibly common problem, and surprisingly, it has less to do with memory and more to do with how our brains process information.

The reason we forget names so easily is because they are arbitrary labels. Unlike faces, which our brains are wired to recognize instinctively, names don’t have inherent meaning. When we meet someone new, our brain is flooded with information—what they look like, what they’re wearing, how they sound, what we’re going to say next. In that flood of data, a name is just another piece of information competing for attention. If we don’t make a conscious effort to store it, it disappears almost instantly.

As a teacher, I’ve had to develop strategies to get better at name recall, because in my profession, remembering names isn’t just about politeness—it’s about building relationships. One of the most effective tricks is association. If I meet a student named Oliver who loves soccer, I immediately think, “Oliver, like Oliver Kahn, the famous goalkeeper.” Creating a mental link between a name and something meaningful makes it stick. Another trick is repetition. When a student introduces themselves, I repeat their name back: “Nice to meet you, Emma.” I then try to use it again in conversation: “Emma, what do you think about this question?” The more I use a name, the more likely I am to remember it.

Writing names down also helps. At the start of the school year, I create seating charts with names and pictures. Even outside of the classroom, jotting down names in a notebook or phone can reinforce memory. There’s also a trick I’ve found useful in parent meetings—when I meet a new parent, I silently spell their name in my head. This small act forces my brain to pay closer attention to the name itself, rather than just the interaction.

Of course, the biggest key to remembering names is genuinely caring. If I rush through introductions or treat them as a formality, the names won’t stick. But when I pause, make eye contact, and show a real interest in the person I’m meeting, the chances of remembering their name increase dramatically. The bottom line? No one is “bad” at remembering names. We just don’t give our brains the right tools to do it. And in a world where personal connections matter more than ever, learning this skill is well worth the effort.