Dennis Schulz

For a long time, I lived with an underlying sense of inadequacy. It wasn’t something I always voiced out loud, but it was there, lurking beneath the surface. I looked at others and saw people who seemed to have it all together: friends with thriving careers, relationships that appeared perfect, and seemingly endless energy. Meanwhile, I was constantly fighting the nagging feeling that I wasn’t doing enough, that I wasn’t enough. This fear of not being enough didn’t just affect how I saw myself—it shaped how I approached every part of my life. I put too much pressure on myself to be perfect, to live up to standards I had set in my mind. Whether it was at work, in my friendships, or even in my personal growth, the thought was always there: What if I fall short? What if I’m not good enough? This fear had its roots in my childhood, growing up with high expectations that I thought were normal. It was about constantly being told to strive for more and never feeling like I was qui...

A few years ago, I learned a lesson that completely shifted how I approach relationships, both with others and myself. It wasn’t taught in a seminar or read in a book; it came from a simple moment of frustration. I was trying to “help” a friend by giving unsolicited advice on how they should handle a difficult situation. Instead of gratitude, I was met with a quiet, polite, but firm: “I just need you to listen.” That sentence hit me like a freight train. I realized that I had been so focused on fixing things, on sharing my perspective, that I forgot the most important part of being a friend: simply being present. It’s such a human urge—to want to help, to guide, to nudge people in the direction we think is best. But sometimes, the best gift we can give someone is the freedom to be themselves, mistakes and all. This realization didn’t just stop at friendships. I started noticing how much I did this with everyone—family, colleagues, even strangers. I’d suggest solutions before anyone eve...